The law recognises that 'the failure to protect' is a criminal offence. This usually refers to a mother found guilty of 'causing or allowing the death of her child' while living with the perpetrator of violence towards her child. Our feelings of horror at the cruelty to a child should not stop us from trying to develop a better understanding of the mother who is found guilty of this crime.

Although family life today can take many different forms it is right that the criminal justice system makes a woman responsible for allowing the murder of her child. Mothers are expected to take responsibility for protecting their children from violence.

The first two years of a child’s life are the most critical for forming attachments. Bowlby suggested that during this period children develop an ‘internal working model of attachments’ that shapes the way they view relationships and operate socially. Negative childhood experiences can set their brains to constantly feel danger and fear. This can adversely affect their sense of trust in others, feelings of self-worth and confidence when interacting with others.

The nurturing of children within the family is a process essential for the development of emotionally healthy children, although in recent years nurseries have been taking on more responsibility for this. However, a mother who is emotionally under-developed and unsupported may be too pre-occupied with her own needs and at a loss to know how to actively parent her own child. This will certainly have an impact on the child's development.

The woman who has experienced ongoing, unmet dependency needs in infancy will have been unable to develop an inner sense of confidence in herself. As a child she may have been inclined to form a clinging attachment to anyone who took an interest in her and in doing so found the emotional support and nurturing she needed. However, some women with serious unresolved attachment issues may possibly be at risk of entering into a volatile relationship and having poor parenting skills and mental health problems.

Women whose own emotional needs were not met adequately in childhood may feel uncertain about their capacity to cope with the emotional demands of parenthood. A few will make a positive choice not to have children. Others will accept that it is their destiny to have children, although they may feel ambivalent about this. However, many people in society still assume that motherhood is a sign of a woman's healthy and mature development and it is generally considered inappropriate to express any doubts about a woman's capacity to be a good parent.

When a young woman uses her sexual attributes to develop an intimate relationship with a man and 'accidentally' gets pregnant there may be a range of supportive services willing to help her. Any concerns that may emerge generally lead to the assumption that these can be addressed through an understanding approach and practical support.

If a young child suffers from stress and anxiety and disorganised attachment this will certainly put a strain on the relationship with the mother. If a new man comes into the family he may be expected to share some responsibility with the mother for caring for her children and providing appropriate controls.

When a single mother with a child gets into a new relationship with a man she may have a tendency to 'act out' unresolved conflicts from the past and 'forget' her child's needs. However, she may soon come to the realisation that there is no future in their relationship and the couple agree to move on in their lives. Unfortunately, there are some women who continue being attracted to unsuitable men and never discover the satisfactions that are to be found in a happy, loving and lasting relationship. We need a better understanding of the 'unconscious motivation' which drives a mother to do things that are not in her own self-interest and later on results in her partner killing her child.

Violent behaviour within a couple relationship sometimes takes place after an experience of humiliation. A man who feels his own needs are not being met by his partner may have difficulty in expressing his feelings in words and may over-react with physical violence. He may have experienced physical punishment in his own childhood. If so, a child who presents challenging behaviour may be at risk of physical punishment from him, especially if it appears that his partner expects this from him.

This scenario can arise when a woman hides her deep-rooted insecurities without considering the risks posed by her partner. The response from agencies will be influenced by the way that agencies define their professional tasks and the nature of the emotional involvement of the helper with the helped. However, professionals often find themselves working with individuals and families who are resistant to help or where the help given does not produce any apparent change in behaviour. It is possible that they will be increasingly inclined to withdraw their interest in these people. The only alternative may be the use of legal powers which, though unwelcome, may become necessary.

Hilary Searing

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